Lookin good...

I saw "Get Smart" today with Steve Carrell and Anna Hathaway. It was pretty funny. I went alone, and I don't ever laugh out loud when I am alone...but this movie made me do it a few times. Since we're being completely honest here I may as well throw it out there that I am extremely attracted to Steve Carrell. There, I said it. I think the number one quality that endears me to people is their ability to make me laugh. And Mr. Carrell just cracks me up. Plus, I mean just look at him- I had no clue the man was 45 years old- he looks 10 years younger than that, at least!
Annnnnyway, I am pretty famous among my friends for finding people attractive, who (generally) aren't conventionally attractive. Oh well. I like my taste :) Some other actors/musicians I find attractive: Alicia Keys (gorgeous!!! I have the biggest girl crush on her...), Paz Vega, Christian Bale (one of the conventional people on my hotty list), John Cusack, Will Smith (another), Gael Garcia Bernal, Tony Leung Ka Fai, Brian Stokes Mitchell, Zubin Varla...I think I'll stop there. I don't think too many popular Indian actors are attractive; for some reason, Hrithik Roshan and Arjun Rampal, for example... just don't do it for me. I think most of the attractive Indians I've seen have been in person. I like the way Salman and Aamir Khan looked when they were younger, though. I think Madhuri Dixit is really good looking as well. And Madhavan looks cute. Okay really, I'll stop there, haha.
In terms of people I know in real life... well, it's happened on a number of occasions where I initially wasn't attracted to someone, but then after spending time with them, they begin to grow on me and I suddenly begin to think they're the hottest thing on the planet. It's a weird phenomena. I wish it had a name. The funny flip side to it is, if I learn something regarding that person which causes me to lose respect for them, they turn ugly again. Is it just me or does this happen to anyone else?

Switching gears for a second... I have a person in my life. She's someone I consider to be a good friend. She knows a lot about me and I have grown rather close to her which is rather surprising since she is a desi girl and I typically don't get too close to females, let alone females of my kind. This girl is engaged to a man she has been with since she was 14 years old. They grew up together, basically. Their families know each other and all members of both families seem to agree with their marriage. All sounds well, right? Wrong... because they had broken up about a year ago due to his infidelity. And now they're back together, made up, and engaged to WED.
I have been invited to her engagement party and I will definitely go since I consider myself a good friend of hers, and her a good friend of mine. However, it will be a daunting task to have to keep myself from asking about the details of their reconciliation and find out WHY THE HELL she decided to get back together with him. A mistake I had made in the past with very good friends of mine, was giving my honest opinion about things like this, but this time I aim to just obtain the info and gossip without volunteering my opinion. I guess different couples have different rules that they live by, and if she finds it in her heart to take his cheating ass back, and they are both committed to each other and ONLY each other from here on out, then fine. But I honestly don't think I could ever take a cheater back. I'd rather my heart be broken than my time wasted. If a man knows he's a cheater, or if he feels like he is no longer attracted to me, I fully expect to hear about it before any action is taken on his part to physically distance himself from me. I don't like drama and I can handle heartbreak a million times better than I can handle lies, and my wasted precious time. The way I look at it, during all this time you have been unhappy with me, we both could have been looking for other people if you had told me when these feelings first came about. I really hope for my friend's sake that this works out because he is the only real relationship she's ever had, and she has told me herself that she is afraid that there is nobody else on this planet possibly made for her like he is. I hope for MY sake that that isn't true, because I am like her in many ways and I certainly don't want to envision myself settling for someone like him out of fear of not finding someone who appreciates me for what I am and what I am not. I have been asked in casual conversation with friends, about my feelings on open relationships. My first thought is always, why bother with a half-assed commitment in the first place? Well, I have never really had a true open relationship so I guess I don't know. And most people I know who do have them start off fully committed to their partner, and then it slowly deteriorates into an open one. But if a couple decides at any point in their relationship that being open about it is what works for them, then fine, go for it. It's just when someone cheats and isn't upfront with their partner about what's going on, there's lies, feelings, and deception involved. And that's really not good for anyone. I hope I end up with someone smart and secure enough to accept and respect that I consider my time important and therefore, if the time I am spending in a relationship with them is not worth it, I should be informed as such and set free to move on and find someone else. Sounds like a business transaction, I know, and it seems rather cold... but I tend to give a lot of myself to many people and I have endured a lot of loss in my life. I have a very big heart and I throw myself 100% into my relationship. And I don't ever want to waste my time on someone who doesn't commit to me as I commit to them. That's the simple bottom line.