So I found out that my cousin booked the tickets to come to the U.S. "ages ago" and told my father's brother and his whole family that he was coming. Apparently they have been communicating regularly about this for the past however long. His excuse for my not knowing was that he thought his mom was going to tell me and she thought he would tell me (that he was coming to NY). What this indicates to me is that my cousin really doesn't give a shit about seeing me and it just establishes me more firmly as an outsider in the family. After all these years of excluding myself, my family has begun to (continues to...?) exclude me.
I have my own reasons, too. I want to explain them but I feel that this late in the game nobody will really care, or worse, they will tell me to "move on" or "get past it" and just be generally insensitive to what has happened to me to make me such a hermit.
Maybe I should just establish my own family and never look back.
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About Me
- SM
- I enjoy meeting new people and having conversations about everything under the sun. My mottos in life are "mean what you say and say what you mean" and "treat people the way you would like to be treated". I am a tremendously loyal friend and it is easier for me to forgive than to forget. I am highly emotional and uncommonly self-aware. I take immense pleasure in discovering the small things and small spaces in life where happiness lies. I trust people 100% until I am given a reason not to. I have a great appreciation for people who do not strive to fit in with the majority, and instead are comfortable just being themselves. I'm a little eccentric and proud of it. Most people have the wrong idea about me until they get to know me. Among the things that are important to me are honesty, humility, humor, and creativity.
3 comments:
I recently discovered your wonderful blog, although I must admit I'm a little freaked out because our lives seem to be mirroring each other! Maybe its the young brown-ish nurses' syndrome? Anyhow keep up the blogging and good luck with everything :)
Hi seema,
how are u?you seem to be going through rough times....chin up girl!!
so being detached from one's family is a common thing after all..:p
nice blog btw.. keep it up!
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